Always Yours Page 9

  I unbuttoned my pants, pushing them and my briefs down around my ankles, freeing my rock hard erection. I heard her take in a sharp breath and she licked her lips. She was staring at my dick like it was the last damn Blow Pop on Earth and she hadn't eaten in days.

  "Sit up," I ordered as I looked down at myself. She did as she was told and I stepped between her legs.

  Grabbing hold of my shaft, she looked up at me as her tongue darted out of her mouth and began swirling around the head. My legs twitched and my body stiffed when she ran it down my length. The feeling of her warm, wet saliva made me forget everything except what she was doing to my cock. Gripping her hair with my hand I plunged into her mouth hard. My breathing became heavy and my dick rigid the faster she sucked. She twirled her tongue one last time and sent me barreling out of control. Gripping my waist, she clung to me like I was the last drink she was ever going to have.

  Stroking her hair, she gazed up at me again with a tight lipped smile. "It's all about you now, baby. What do you want me to do to you?" I asked and her eyes lit up with excitement.

  "Just fuck me, Cam. Anyway you want. I'll take it," she begged.

  Tilting her head back by her hair, I looked her straight into the eyes. "You're going to think of me tomorrow, firecracker. Not because you want to, but because you'll have to. Every time you move you'll remember the feeling of my dick slamming into you." I slammed our lips together with an animalistic force. The frantic way she moved her tongue with mine only added to my arousal.

  Breaking the kiss, I picked her up and carried her over to the kitchen table. When I placed her on it, I grabbed her full tits and squeeze them roughly. Propped up by her arms, she let out a low groan as she wrapped her legs around my waist. I bent forward, taking her nipple into my mouth, pinching it between my teeth. I grazed my tongue over it as I rolled and twisted the other, making her head fall back as she cried out in pleasure. "God, Cam, please, take me. I can't wait any longer."

  She laid back and I pulled her to the edge of the table so I could position myself at her entrance. I could already feel her warmth and it sent a surge of desire to my dick. "Are you fucking ready for me, firecracker?" I grunted while palming and stroking myself. Her hand had moved down to her clit and she was rubbing it frantically, her eyes rolling back into her head. I had never been more turned on than I was watching her play with herself.

  When she nodded in agreement, I pushed into her—she was fucking drenched. Tightening her legs around me again, I took hold of her hips and dug my fingers into her flesh.

  I pulled out slowly and then slammed back into her. "Oh, God, Cam!" she screamed out as I drove my cock into her deeper. Keeping my eyes fixated on her, I repeated my assault over and over again, and with each thrust she screamed out louder than the time before.

  "You like that, firecracker? Huh?" I said, pounding into her again. "Tell me how much you like it, baby. Tell me this pussy is mine."

  "Fuck! I love it," she whimpered as she continued rubbing herself. "This is only for you, baby. You own it, you own every inch of my body."

  "Damn straight," I growled. "Now fucking come, Cara. I need you to come, baby."

  I felt her walls squeeze around my cock so tight that I could feel the pulse of her orgasm as it ripped through her and that was my trigger. I collapsed on top of her as I exploded violently—every muscle in our bodies taut with pleasure as we rode out our climaxes together.

  The next morning I woke up to Cara's naked and sedated body pressed up against mine. I couldn't believe I had fallen asleep. This was the first time since Amber that I had ever actually slept in another woman's bed—I didn't know how I felt about it. It was out of the ordinary for me but looking down at Cara, watching her sleep, eased every bit of uncertainty I was feeling. Pulling her in tighter, I nestled down, putting my face in the curve of her neck, inhaling deeply. She smelled fucking amazing. I began to drown in the scent of lavender mixed with the salty smell of sweat from the night before and it ravaged my senses.

  Fighting the urge to wake her up so I could have my way with her again, I closed my eyes and tried to fall back asleep. That was until she began to stir. Softly and unhurriedly I began caressing her arm with the tips of my fingers, silently praying she was waking up. My morning wood was in an uproar and there was no doubt it wanted her to alleviate the commotion.

  Moving my hand down, and across her stomach, she jerked in her sleep and a loud sob released from deep within her chest. It scared the shit out of me.

  Ripping my hand away, I sat up and looked at her. She was still asleep, tears pouring from her eyes. Her arms were wrapped around her midsection as her whole body shook with fear. I began shaking her lightly, trying to wake her from the sea of darkness that was consuming her but it was no use, she was in too deep. She began mumbling something that sounded like, "don't take her, please don't take her”, but it was hard to make anything out through the wailing howls. Her skin was starting to form beads of sweat and I knew I needed to save her from her own mind.

  "Cara!" I yelled as I rolled her over so she was facing me. Taking hold of both her shoulders, I shook her again, this time harder and more forcefully. "You're having a nightmare, firecracker, wake up."

  Her eyes flew open as she looked around the room in a panic. "Cam?" she gasped as she tried to catch her breath. She seemed confused but relieved to see me in front of her.

  "Shhh, it's okay. You were having a bad dream," I reassured her, pulling her into my chest. Something about the way she was acting made me think that she had these nightmares a lot.

  It took her a good five minutes before she moved from my hold and when she did, she didn't say a word. She just got up and headed straight for the bathroom, without so much as a glance in my direction. I didn't know what to do.

  Check on her? Leave?

  I wasn't good at this sort of thing but I hated the fact that she was in distress.

  I decided to give her a few minutes before checking on her. I was just getting out of the bed when she opened the bathroom door. Having gotten dressed in a pair of black shorts and a purple tank top, she paused in the doorway, leaning against the frame. Her eyes were red from the tears but besides that, she didn't look sad or distressed anymore, she appeared at ease.

  "You okay, firecracker?" I asked her.

  "Yep, I'm kind of used to waking up that way." She looked down at the ground almost as if she were embarrassed for having a nightmare that she couldn't control.

  "That doesn't seem like a fun way to start your day. Do you have them a lot?" I probed, trying to get more information from her without seeming overbearing.

  "Lately, I have been," she disclosed, still looking at the ground.

  "What are they about?" I asked with anticipation, knowing she probably wouldn't tell me. Cara's past was a secret place, I was pretty sure she didn't allow many people to see and I couldn't imagine she was essentially ready to share it with me. She walked across the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. I playfully nudged her with my elbow. "Are they disturbing sex dreams?" I teased her. She looked at me with one eye brow raised. "You know that BMDS shit or whatever it's called."

  She began laughing. "Do you mean BDSM?"

  "Ehh, same thing," I said, shrugging my shoulder at her. "Are they those kinds of dreams? Cause if they are that would be fucking hot." I was trying to lighten her mood a bit and by the look of her upward turned lips I knew it was working.

  "Umm, yeah, no, not even close, Cam," she said while giving me a good-humored shove.

  "Well then, spill it." I turned my body in her direction, giving her my undivided attention. "What are you so terrified of?"

  "Being hurt again," she mumbled as she grabbed the draw strings on her shorts and started twirling them in her fingers.

  "Who was he?" I bluntly asked her. I wanted to know, even though I had an eerie feeling I was going to want to punch something or someone after she told me.

  She took a deep breath. "He was my high school boyfr
iend, Lance Blackwell. We were together almost our whole senior year. We had plans to go to college together, and later on, get married, start a life and have a family. Until..." She paused, closing her eyes as if mentally convincing herself to continue. "I told him I was pregnant."

  Holy shit!

  I was not expecting that. A million things started running through my mind. Where was the kid now? Did she keep it? Did she still love this guy? Was he still a part of her life? I just sat there as the silence in the room ate at me. I knew I needed to say something but I had no clue what. That's when she continued, "He thought having a baby would ruin his life. He had a football scholarship to CU and there was no way he was going to lose it. He asked me what I planned on doing about it, like he wanted me to abort it. The man I was going to spend the rest of my life with disappeared that night—in a matter of minutes he became a stranger to me." Her finger was turning purple from having the drawstring wrapped around it so tightly. "I, however, was not going to give up my baby, not for anything or anyone." Her voice was cracking and I could tell she was trying to hold back the tears. "When I told him I was keeping it, he walked away and never looked back."

  Yep, I wanted to punch him.

  "What an ass," I snapped.

  "He traded me in, just like my father did. That night I vowed I would never allow myself to fall for his type again and then you walked into my life."

  I finally understood why Cara had such a problem with egotistical guys. Between her jackass father and this Lance prick, she thought every guy that showed the least bit of assurance was just like them. But there was one thing she didn't understand.

  "There is a thin line between confidence and arrogance, Cara. Confidence is strong and silent while arrogance is loud and weak." She looked up from her drawstrings and smiled halfheartedly at me. "He wasn't a man, at least not one that deserved you. No real man would've ever walked away from a mistake like that." I tried to reassure her as I placed my hand in hers.

  "He was far from a real man. Three months later he proved that when he drunkenly told the bitch he was hooking up with that I got pregnant on purpose." She looked back down at her drawstring but I held her hand tighter so she couldn't fumble with it. The hurt on her face morphed into a deeper pain. "I was only eighteen. I was pregnant and left to raise her on my own. I was so scared and I was the running joke of the entire school. I shouldn't have gotten in the car that night, but I did." She couldn't hold back the tears any longer and they started slowly spilling down her cheeks. "I was so upset when I left the party, I couldn't stop the tears and I wasn't thinking straight..." Her brow creased as she tightly shut her eyes. "I didn't even see the stop sign." My heart sank for her and instantly I knew what the nightmare had been about. "I remember waking up right after the accident. I was still in the car, my legs pinned under the dash. I hurt everywhere but nothing compared to the pain of knowing I was losing her."

  I didn't know what to say. I had no idea what it felt like to lose a child. Nor did I ever want to find out. I took her in my arms as she cried, letting her get it all out. I knew Cara was stronger than any woman I had ever met. She had gone through the unthinkable, yet, didn't play the victim or point fingers, unless they were at herself. She was still standing, facing each day and pushing through.

  The next two weeks flew by and things had been running pretty smooth between Cam and I. Neither of us had tried to run since I freaked out, and we were getting along better than I ever could've imagined. I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders since I told him about Lance and everything that had happened in my past.

  "All right, enough is enough, Cara," Shay said as she stepped into my office. "Who are you and what have you done with my pissed off-despairing-hopeless-negative friend?"

  "What are you talking about, Shay?"

  "You....you're so happy all the time. It just isn't—"

  "Normal?" I interrupted her as I leaned back in my chair, folding my arms over my chest.

  "No, I was going to say, it isn't like you. To use the word normal you'd have to be normal to begin with, and we both know you're not normal." I rolled my eyes at her. "Seriously, though, every time I see you lately you're grinning like a damn love-struck teenager and it's starting to freak me out," she said matter-of-factly.

  "I don't know what you're talking about," I claimed as I looked back down at the stack of order forms on my desk, trying to avoid her stare. She was right, though, I had been excessively happy the past two weeks and that was a big deal for me.

  "You're such a crappy liar," she huffed. I peeked up at her through hooded eyes. "See, there it is again!"

  "Whatever, Shay," I grunted, returning to my work.

  "It's written all over your face, girl. Just admit it. Cam's having an effect on you."

  "You want me to admit it? Fine, Cam makes me happy. In fact, I haven't been this happy in years." I paused for a moment as I thought about what I was going to say next. "But what I don't want to do right now, is acknowledge it. Acknowledging it makes it a reality, and in my reality, I always get burned. You of all people know this. I'm just not ready for that pain again."

  She looked at me with sympathy. "Fine, but you can't keep your feelings hidden from him. If you break up, you'll regret it for the rest of your life."

  "We aren't together, remember, no labels," I reminded her, keeping my head down.

  "Cara, when two people are having sex and they agree not to sleep with anyone else, that usually means they're together. Call it what you want, but don't say I didn't warn you, sweetie."

  "Warn you about what?" The profound voice echoed in my ear and my whole body came alive. I looked up and just as I expected, I saw Cam standing in the doorway next to Shay.

  He looked delectable in a pair of faded blue jeans that had rips in all the right places, and a grey ribbed tank top that showed off his tribal tattoo and muscular arms. His aviator sunglasses were hanging from his collar and his hair was jumbled like he had just woken up. I had to squeeze my legs shut just from the sight of him.

  "Oh, um, Shay was just—"

  "I was just warning her about your arrogance," Shay butted in. Cam's eyes narrowed as he glared at her. Shay knew how much that comment was going to piss him off, but then, I'm sure that's why she said it. She hadn't been nice to Cam since that day in the parking lot when he scared the shit out of us, not that Cam had been pleasant to her either. When they were together, it was like trying to referee a rivaling football game and I was getting sick of it.

  "Shay, stop it," I warned. She rolled her eyes and left the office quickly, giving Cam the stink eye before disappearing around the corner.

  "Is she always such a bitch?" Cam asked as he entered the room.

  "Only to you," I teased. "What are you doing here anyway? I thought I was going to meet you and Blake for dinner later.

  "Oh, you are," he affirmed. "I just stopped by to see if you would do me a favor?" He took a seat in the chair in front of my desk.

  "Sure, just name it."

  "Come to the firefighter's ball with me on Saturday." His favor seemed more like a demand the way he said it.

  "I thought your shift agreed to go without dates since Cash just got divorced?" I said, tilting my head in confusion.

  When Cam had first told me about the ball I was a little disappointed that they had agreed to remain dateless for the event. A part of me really wanted to go.

  "Well, we were, but that was before Blake fucked up and invited some girl. And if he's taking a date then so am I. There's no way I'm going to be part of some sausage fest when I can have a beautiful woman by my side." He leaned back in the chair crossing his foot over his knee while he placed his hands behind his head. "Oh, and when I say Blake is taking a date, I mean a real, honest-to-god-I-think-he-loves-her-already-date."

  "What? You're kidding?" I screeched. There was no way Blake was in love. He was the biggest womanizer I had ever met. Just last weekend he had taken home a different girl each night, and they w
ere friends—how he pulled that one off, I'll never know, and now he was supposedly in love with some girl—yeah, this I had to see.

  "Nope, I'm telling ya, this Tessa chick is different. He's known her for years but somehow they never hooked up. You'll understand when you see him tonight. He's like a love sick puppy."

  Blake had started to grow on me over the past two weeks. Even though he was a total jackass, he was sweet to me, in a protective, big brother sort of way, and he had a good heart. Plus, he was one of Cam's best friends and if Cam liked him, then who was I to judge. "Well, in that case, I have to be there. I want to meet the girl that's taming the wild bachelor."

  The next week we walked into the firefighter's ball hand in hand. The ballroom was unbelievable, with projected fire flames dancing on the walls and beautiful tables with massive white birch trees for center pieces. It was hard not to be in awe of everything in the room. Still, with all of the elaborate decorations around me, I still couldn't tear my eyes away from Cam.

  His Perry Ellis tux looked like it had been made just for him. The dark grey color of the suit mixed with the ice blue tie made his overwhelming eyes that much brighter. Not to mention the colors complemented my dress perfectly. I had no idea how he coordinated our outfits so well. I had borrowed the dress from Shay so there was only one way he would've been able to find out what color it was.

  The dress was perfect and it showed off all my curves. The low cut halter neckline was trimmed with silver sequins and the long, satin skirt had a slit that showed just the right amount of leg. It was sexy yet sophisticated and I loved it.

  After grabbing a couple of drinks we headed off to our table. Adam and Brent were already seated when we walked up. Brent looked handsome in his black tux and tie, while Adam seemed almost like a different person. He looked so unusual dressed up for the event that I hardly recognized him. His signature scruffy face had been shaved clean and his once disheveled, black hair had been cut short, allowing me to finally get a good glimpse at his absorbing light brown eyes. I had never thought Adam was particularly melt-your-panties-hot, but tonight, seeing him dressed up, he sure as hell was.